Chapter 1: Debriefing
1 DEBRIEFING
Office of the Principal
Nathan Hale Building
The Academy of Espionage
Washington, DC
May 15
1500 hours
The principal was acting stranger than usual.
In my sixteen months at the CIA¡¯s Academy of Espionage, I had seen the principal display many aspects of his personality, none of which were good. He had been angry, bitter, paranoid, churlish, jealous, contemptuous, ornery, disdainful, mercurial, obnoxious, flummoxed, confused, passive-aggressive, and just plain mean. But the day I was assigned to Operation Deadly Manatee, his behavior was the most unsettling of all.
He was trying to be nice.
With most people, of course, this would have been a good thing. But with the principal it felt wrong, as though he was fighting every natural instinct he had. Watching him try to be nice was like watching a tiger try to eat a salad.
¡°Benjamin!¡± he exclaimed upon opening the door to his office, with what was obviously forced enthusiasm. ¡°Such a pleasure to see you!¡±
¡°Er¡¦ thanks,¡± I said warily.
¡°Please come in. Make yourself comfortable. Everyone else will be here soon.¡± The principal waved me into his office and attempted to smile. It was evident that the man hadn¡¯t smiled very much and wasn¡¯t quite sure how to do it. Instead of appearing friendly and welcoming, he looked like someone suffering from a bad case of indigestion.
I cautiously stepped into his office¡ªor rather, what remained of it. Nine months earlier, I had accidentally blown up the principal¡¯s office with a mortar round. (Which explained some of the principal¡¯s general ill temper toward me, but not all of it.) Budget issues and red tape had kept the repairs from proceeding quickly, forcing the principal to temporarily relocate his office to a broom closet, which he had been extremely peeved about. When I had been notified to report to his original office, I expected to find that it had been restored to its previous condition.
This was not the case. In fact, almost no work had been done on the office at all. The entire exterior wall was still missing. A haphazard attempt had been made to reinforce that side of the room with a spindly framework of two-by-fours, but there was still a gaping hole¡ªand since we were on the fifth floor of the Nathan Hale Administration Building, this meant that a misstep could result in a quick plummet down to the campus quadrangle. The furniture hadn¡¯t been replaced and was all slightly charred, while what remained of the carpet smelled like a doused campfire. The principal¡¯s beloved desk, which had been incinerated in the blast, had been replaced by a wobbly piece of plywood laid across two sawhorses¡ªalthough the principal had managed to procure a new rolling chair.
¡°I recognize that it¡¯s still a work in progress,¡± the principal said weakly. ¡°They won¡¯t be able to start the repairs until December. But I just couldn¡¯t take working in that broom closet anymore. And now that it¡¯s spring, it¡¯s not so bad. I kind of like th...e open design. All the fresh air is invigorating.¡±
¡°I can see that,¡± I said as supportively as I could. The hole in the wall certainly let in plenty of fresh air. And pigeons. A dozen of them were roosting in what remained of the ceiling, which meant that a good amount of the floor was speckled with pigeon droppings.
The principal ignored them and made a show of taking a deep breath. ¡°Ah. It¡¯s far better than all the stale, recirculated air you¡¯d get in a normal office. I suppose, in a way, I ought to thank you for destroying this place.¡± He attempted another smile for me, although I had the sense that he didn¡¯t feel like smiling at all, and that he was only playing at being nice to mask his natural enraged state.
I wondered what was going on.
There was a knock at the door. The principal started back for it, intending to open it, but this proved unnecessary when the hinges simply tore free from the damaged frame, and the door toppled into the office.
This revealed four more people standing in the doorway, all of whom had apparently also been summoned to the meeting.
Two were fellow students from spy school: Mike Brezinski and Erica Hale. Mike had been my best friend in my normal life, back before I had been recruited to the academy. I was supposed to keep the academy¡¯s existence a secret from Mike (as well as everyone else on earth), but he had eventually figured out where I was really going and been rewarded for his cleverness by getting recruited.
Meanwhile, Erica had known about the academy for her entire life, as she was a legacy. She came from a long line of spies and had been training since a very young age to follow in her family¡¯s footsteps. Thus, she was significantly more talented than any of her fellow trainees at school¡ªand most actual spies as well.
The other two invitees were Erica¡¯s parents. Catherine Hale was an exceptionally talented agent for Britain¡¯s MI6¡ªand a doting mother. Somehow she found a way to balance both lives and was as adept at thwarting criminals as she was at baking cookies.
Meanwhile, Alexander Hale was a fraud. Until very recently, his greatest skill as a spy had been convincing people that he was skilled as a spy. This had worked for him for quite a long time, and he had been respected and admired by his peers, until he was finally found out and disgraced. Since then, he had managed to redeem himself slightly, after ending up on a few missions with me¡ªalong with Catherine, Erica, and Mike.
¡°Greetings!¡± the principal exclaimed as pleasantly as he could. ¡°Welcome, everyone! I¡¯m glad you could make it!¡±
The other four responded to this in varying ways. Catherine and Erica both regarded the principal suspiciously, probably wondering what could explain his friendliness, while Mike was more cautious, as though he suspected that perhaps the real principal had been kidnapped and replaced with an impostor. Alexander didn¡¯t appear to notice any difference at all.
¡°It¡¯s good to see you, too,¡± he said, shaking the principal¡¯s hand. ¡°I like the new layout of the office. Very spacious. So, what¡¯s the reason for this get-together?¡±
¡°I¡¯d be happy to explain that.¡± A woman I had never met brusquely swept into the room. She appeared to be in her forties, wore a tailored business suit, and had a briefcase handcuffed to her right wrist. She didn¡¯t seem at all surprised by the state of the principal¡¯s office, which indicated to me that she had been there before. ¡°I¡¯m Indira Kapoor, deputy director of operations at the CIA. I¡¯ve been paying close attention to your careers, and I must say, most of you have done some very impressive work.¡± She turned slightly away from Alexander as she said this, as if to make it clear that the phrase ¡°most of you¡± didn¡¯t apply to him.
Alexander appeared not to notice this, either. ¡°Why, thank you,¡± he said, flashing Indira a suave smile.
Alexander was a very handsome man, and I had seen his smile make other women go weak in the knees, but Indira was impervious to it. Instead, she kept her gaze locked on Erica, Mike, and me. ¡°I recognize that, due to many mistakes on the part of the Agency, the three of you have ended up on missions far earlier than would normally be recommended for young agents. But you have all handled yourselves capably and acted with ingenuity and skill, which is obviously a testament to the education you have received at this institution.¡± She shifted her attention to the principal. ¡°So I suppose I owe you congratulations as well.¡±
The principal now flashed what appeared to be an actual smile. ¡°Thank you, Deputy Kapoor. I¡¯ve done my best to whip these junior agents into shape.¡± He plopped down into his desk chair and waved the rest of us to a charbroiled sofa.
I suddenly understood the reason for the principal¡¯s shift in personality. We were making him look good.
To my side, Erica bristled with anger. There were plenty of good things about the Academy of Espionage, but the principal wasn¡¯t one of them. If anything, he¡¯d b